This is why Michael should not leave me alone with my thoughts

It's 10 pm and I am alone. For the time being. The kids have only now drifted off to dreamland and my house could use a good cleaning. But who wants to do housework at 10 pm? Who wants to do housework ever? Not I, said Lazy Emily.
I've been thinking a lot lately about Boone. I'm missing him (or maybe it's just the idea of another baby boy) something fierce. We never got to hold him or snuggle him or watch him grow. I was only 20 weeks along when we lost him, but every time I think of our family, I feel this little empty spot. Like something was there once, but it's been moved and all that's left is a dusty space.
When we had Elayna we (Michael and I) both said that she would be our last; our tail end; our caboose. But that's something that is so hard for me to come to terms with sometimes. Most times, I feel happy with our choice. I feel blessed to be a mother to our 3 beautiful, healthy children. I am content in knowing that I won't ever have to deal with morning sickness, or baby weight, or maternity clothes, or potty training, or a person with a medical degree checking out my goods once a month. But then I see all these sweet, sweet babies and my womb starts to feel empty. Sometimes I feel a movement in my abdominal cavity and I think, "Oh! Baby!" But then the logical side takes over and I realize it was just gas. My arms ache to hold and nuzzle a little one. My olfactory glands start reminding me how delicious babies smell and my heart does these little flip flops. Ugh. Does it, will it ever go away? Please tell me that I'm not losing my mind here. Please say that I'm not the only woman to have gone through this. Please say that all of you or at least some of you (women) have felt this. Tell me that it's normal because babies are simply irresistible anyway. Please tell me so that I can fold this feeling up into a teeny tiny origami baby blanket and put it away for when my children have children and then I can pull it out and wrap my grand-babies in it. Either that or tell me that we should just try for another baby boy. Michael?

Didn't see that one coming did you? Neither did I. Crap.

Comments

I've felt it before, but then I had to remind myself that I am a male and I don't have a womb. I definitely think you should try for another boy. Come on Em, It's uterUS not uterU. Those are my thoughts.

actog: the sound one makes while choking. "Oh but the funniest part was.. actog!!! Oh my gosh! I almost choked on that steak!"
Emily you are an amazing and strong woman! I am continually amazed at the strength of women like you who have continued to live their lives after the loss of a baby, and can still find joy in life. I know the baby hunger feeling. Somedays I wonder if Steve and I made the right choice to "permanently" be done having children. I get a little baby hungry and see my sisters all having babies and think "Oh I really want one too!" But then for me I come back to my reality of why we made the decision we made...(due to the complications and my health during Peyton's pregnancy) and I am then okay with the fact that I will have to wait a LONG time to have grandbabies to snuggle! Follow your heart...maybe there is another little baby (boy) who wants to come to your family!

P.S. I love your joy in life...Anytime I am having a rough or long day I can read your blog and smile...thanks for being a great friend!
Emily said…
Yah, I get that feeling, but I'm not done doing the baby thing either. I know that doesn't help. You're a GREAT Mom! If you decide to have another one he/she would indeed be a very blessed individual. Good Luck!
Mandy said…
I've been feeling that way a lot lately myself. I've been wondering if there is one more, but Troy says we are done. I have had a hard time with it too. Good luck and I love you!!!
Penny said…
You are not alone dear, your feelings are normal for a woman who loves her children and has a heart bigger than Montana. If you were closer to home and closer to baby nieces those feelings would not be so loud. I still miss that baby feeling after all these years.
Oh how I love you. I feel that feeling a lot. Miss you Em...
Terrie said…
I was going to tell you a story about me at 31 but my situation was nothing like yours is. Needless to say, it didn't happen for me but I can say without a shadow of a doubt, you are an awesome woman and mother. Whatever decision you make,I know you will make it for the right reasons and regardless of what others think you should or should not do, whatever happens will be right for you and your family. Love you tons, Em. Aunt Terrie
Unknown said…
I totally know how you feel.
Lindsay said…
You don't know me... my favorite friend (vicky devenport) sent me your way. We have a lot in common. I lost a little boy at the same stage in my pregnancy. I can relate all too well to what you are going through. I just wanted to tell you how very sorry I am you've had to join the mommies with angels club. I know how bad it hurts to want a baby and to know that no more are coming. I am here (if it isn't too weird... ya know, since you don't know me. and all) if you need a friend who has been there.

lots of love
Lindsay
Unknown said…
oh Sweet ERMA! My heart goes out to you.....(BIG SIGH) I say...go for it! Just do what your heart is telling you to do......

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