Michael, Willie, and Twinkle Twinkle
Today as I was sitting at McDonald's I started writing on a napkin. It kept me sane from all the screaming tots whose parents have no patience and just yell right back at them. I think the noise was getting to them, too, and their nerves were on end. Whoever said that taking the kids to McD's to play would be relaxing? Laynee came up to me at one point and said, "Mom, why everybody screams?" Without giving me time to answer, she turned around and ran back into the foray with her fingers in her ears and yelled to all the kids, "KIDS! STOP SCREAMING-AH! Gosh." Love her.
Oooh hoo hoo, there was a naughty little girl with a funny name - kind of like Cumorah only it was Shumorah - and she gave her grandmother the Look of Death complete with a little wag of her fingers as if she were casting a spell on her to doom her to the underworld for time and all eternity.
I began to wonder (while writing down all these thoughts on my napkin) why I decided to venture into the land of germs and out-of-controllers and ginormous slides that electroshock your child as she slides down them. Maybe because when we drove past it on our way to the grocery store (which is inconveniently situated in the same parking lot as McD's), Laynee so sweetly said, "Mom? I peeth play thayer?" And lately she's been not so sweetly saying things like, "NO MOM!" or "GET ME A DRINK." and "PUT ME DOWN." So when she asked so nicely and without prompting, I couldn't turn her down.
Not long after I was contemplating these things, in walked Millie, the Mickey Dee's rag lady, come to wipe down the tables and high chairs and who's hair looked like it would hold through a tornado and smelled like potpourri.
Speaking of tornadoes - I dreamt the other night that Michael, me and Willie Nelson were in the middle of the desert somewhere and we were being pursued by a land surveyor who wanted to charge us money for a pond that he had purposely but secretively drained, and the 3 of us (Willie, Michael and I) hid in said drained pond, but were followed and joined by Surveyor. Suddenly we looked up and watched as dark clouds formed overhead and became a raging tornado that we were all unexpectedly in the midst of. Somewhere along it's way, the tornado had picked up an upright piano, and it was whirling and twirling above our heads. Just as suddenly as the storm appeared, it vanished. But not before it dropped the piano on Surveyor who just happened to be sitting right next to me. We decided it was time to vacate our pond shelter, but before we did so, I remember wanting to play a little tune on the piano. I believe it was Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Willie accompanied me on his guitar and Michael danced a jig.
We left McDonald's and all the crazies and did eventually make it to the grocery store, but not before I got the Twinkle tune stuck in the head of every toddler there. Sweet sweet revenge.
Oooh hoo hoo, there was a naughty little girl with a funny name - kind of like Cumorah only it was Shumorah - and she gave her grandmother the Look of Death complete with a little wag of her fingers as if she were casting a spell on her to doom her to the underworld for time and all eternity.
I began to wonder (while writing down all these thoughts on my napkin) why I decided to venture into the land of germs and out-of-controllers and ginormous slides that electroshock your child as she slides down them. Maybe because when we drove past it on our way to the grocery store (which is inconveniently situated in the same parking lot as McD's), Laynee so sweetly said, "Mom? I peeth play thayer?" And lately she's been not so sweetly saying things like, "NO MOM!" or "GET ME A DRINK." and "PUT ME DOWN." So when she asked so nicely and without prompting, I couldn't turn her down.
Not long after I was contemplating these things, in walked Millie, the Mickey Dee's rag lady, come to wipe down the tables and high chairs and who's hair looked like it would hold through a tornado and smelled like potpourri.
Speaking of tornadoes - I dreamt the other night that Michael, me and Willie Nelson were in the middle of the desert somewhere and we were being pursued by a land surveyor who wanted to charge us money for a pond that he had purposely but secretively drained, and the 3 of us (Willie, Michael and I) hid in said drained pond, but were followed and joined by Surveyor. Suddenly we looked up and watched as dark clouds formed overhead and became a raging tornado that we were all unexpectedly in the midst of. Somewhere along it's way, the tornado had picked up an upright piano, and it was whirling and twirling above our heads. Just as suddenly as the storm appeared, it vanished. But not before it dropped the piano on Surveyor who just happened to be sitting right next to me. We decided it was time to vacate our pond shelter, but before we did so, I remember wanting to play a little tune on the piano. I believe it was Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Willie accompanied me on his guitar and Michael danced a jig.
We left McDonald's and all the crazies and did eventually make it to the grocery store, but not before I got the Twinkle tune stuck in the head of every toddler there. Sweet sweet revenge.
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